Today I did something which is making me really sad. I wrote about Neil’s kinder teacher here. Things have gone progressively worse since then. She was absent a lot and a few other things had happened. Moms who volunteered in the classroom were very upset. 8 parents transferred their kids out to the afternoon class. Moms were seeing the principal everyday. There were emails flying back and forth.
We finally had a long term sub. She is nice but the parents were not happy. They wanted assurance that our original teacher would not come back. A letter was written to the school district. Each parent was asked to sign it. NK meanwhile was unaware of things that were happening. He knew parents were upset but not the emails or that a petition was to be signed. One fine morning, one of the moms approached him to sign it and he refused saying he doesnt know whats written and he wouldnt sign it. I told him I will sign it.
I signed it and it was sent to the school district. Meanwhile the sub is doing great. The kids loved her, blah blah.
Yesterday I got a phonecall saying that a investigator is assigned to this whole thing and each parent who signed that petition has to attend a one on one meeting. Mine was today(btw I wore a highly professional outfit)
It was a short meeting. He recorded my entire conversation. I told him the facts.
1.I have never volunteered in the class so I dont know first hand how she handled the kids.
2.The general feeling I get from her is that she seems overwhelmed by the kids
3. She wasnt very organized on the first day of school. I waited till Back to School night to form an opinion on her. She did well that, she had a sharing schedule, she gave us a plan with themes laid out and everything. Everything looked good. I came back reassured that night.Then she was absent a lot and we had 5 subs in the first 3 weeks of school.
He then asked me about homework. I said I am not a fan of homework for kindergarten and I dont care either way. he then asked me whether the classroom was decorated when the original teacher was there. I said I didnt pay attention to that.
He then asks me something else and I said, I do not want to share that with you and he laughs.I said something and asked him whether he could erase it. He laughed and said no.He then says, we can end and stopped the tape. Off record I told him, I dont want to do this. I dont someone to lose his/her job because of me. Its going to come back and bite me in the ass.He assured me that it wouldnt come to that YET.
Big believer in Karma—>me. I wished I was stronger to go against those moms who started the fucking petition in the first place. I should have said what I felt. I didnt and now this poor woman might not only lose her job but her teaching license. And its all because of a bunch of crazy moms. The same one who started the witch hunt. Most of the moms who are doing this, its their first child and its their first time in public school. I have a 5th grader, if it was her class.. I would be concerned..but its kindergarten and I wasnt that bothered. I really wish I didnt sign that damm petition in the first place.
Hey S.Dont Beat yourself up..I know how you feel, I hate it when it happens (doing something you feel you shouldnt have done)..But I guess you did it mostly on instincts and for the greater good of the children…Think Good thoughts:) .All will be well.
Me: Sigh I hope soo too.
I would go see the principal and tell you everything you wish you had said but didn’t. Do it SOON! He can add the info & you can clear your hart… Sounds like this teacher really needs this break from somebody if the moms are really that bad with their witch hunting skills as you say…
Me: I have already gone to the principal and told him all this. It was before we signed the letter. All he said that he appreciated it and thats it.
don’t feel too upset. I know exactly how you feel and actually wrote about it here http://sandsrandomramblings.wordpress.com/2009/10/01/the-art-of-teaching/ It’s tough to make these choices but at least in my case taking it up to the principal has been beneficial.
Me: I know..it’s tough deciding what to do
Hey don’t worry so much and don’t take all responsibility on yourself. Do talk to the principal and explain everything to him. But if nothing happens it is not your problem…..this would have happened whether you signed it or not.
i wish i knew what to say…but this i know when a teacher is absent a lot, some kids don’t like the changes…In Singapore, my 5 yrold had like 3 teachers in 4 months and i could see that he was getting very upset.
take heart…and i wish things work out for the lady
Awww…I know how that feels. I hate when moms do that witch hunt. And I usually am the one feeling bad for the teacher…most teachers can improve their skills n attitudes given proper feedback and training AND experience. Maybe she just needs some re-training. I would give some constructive feedback and do-able suggestions (in writing) so she could at least do a better job next time (if they don’t take away her license). I’ve done that with some school issues and had a really good response.
and I totally get what you say abt it being the first child. I’m in the same boat with Dhruv…I find some of his classmates’ moms more hyper-reactive since it’s their first kid…like I used to be…complaining abt really trivial stuff.
I understand that you feel bad that this woman may lose her job. If it makes you feel any better, it probably would have happened whether or not you signed the petition.
I once prevented a woman from coming onto my project because I had worked with her before and didn’t think she stood out among the other people in line for the position. She was a nice person, but just not motivated. Based on my feedback, someone else was given the position, and she was subsequently laid off from the company because no project wanted her. I had several bad dreams that she was homeless because of me. But really, it wasn’t MY fault. It was HER fault for not working harder, and it may have been a blessing in disguise, because maybe it forced her to do something else, something she enjoyed and was good at.
So, maybe this teacher doesn’t really like being a kindergarten teacher, and this would force her to find something else she would be happier with.
I so agree with Suma, at this young age consistency is really important. Her absences are documented and ultimately that will probably be her downfall and not what Im sure the school administration can see as the stirrings of a bunch of over zealous gossips with too much time on their hands. I think that the whole shitstorm that happened over the h1n1 really showed you what nasty bitches those other moms are and now you must feel lumped in with them. You know now going forward what they are made of and you just have to keep your chin up (or as my Dad would say “keep your pecker up”–pecker meaning nose but o my is it funny on another level) and be extra wary of what they will cook up next.
hugs, that must have been really tough today.
Me: keep your pecker up..I am going to throw that out at random times. I dont know whats going to happen to the teacher..sigh
dont be hard on urself…
hugs
Hey its ok – you didn’t start the witch hunt and you just provided your honest feedback – don’t be so hard on yourself.
Don’t beat yourself up with it.. You really did play fair.. and provided honest feedback.. Lets hope that they don’t treat her too harshly. I think you really did your best..
I think you stood up for what you believed, which is the way to go. Life is not fair. I think the teacher still will get a chance to get her act together.
I hope the system works this time and does the right thing.
things will turn out ok. you did what you could and went ahead and told the principal.
something similar happened at Cubby’s school. not witch hunt level. but a kid bit another kid and cub. me i just said shit happens and left it at that. the other mother made SUCH a scene. the young teacher was in tears! i knew i couldnt fight 20 other crazy mothers.
so i just gave the teacher a personalized note next day saying not to be too hard on herself and that such things happen.
am sure things will work out fine. its not just your karma, innit? its her as well!
cheers!